Over the holiday weekend I went to NC to visit my MomMom (maternal grandmother). It was a very short trip but I'm so glad I got to go bc she was very happy to see me. It was a surprise. I'd only told my mother who has been staying with her since the beginning of June as a caretaker since her knee replacement surgery.
My MomMom is natural. My mom has been transitioning since Oct/Nov and I've been transitioning since Dec. So natural hair certainly came up in discussion. My mom is having a difficult time and has a lot of breakage. I got to see it first hand. it's pretty bad. there is a section in the center of her head that is completely broken off while other places in the back have a few limp strands hanging on for dear life. Then in the top and front she has pieces that are easily 10 inches long. in short her hair is a mess and she knows it but she is nowhere near ready to chop. even though I think she knows that's what's best to do at this point.
She claims her texture is 'gungy bush'. yet I detangled her hair for her and set it in bantu knots and I would not characterize her hair as so. She has very thick dense hair but I was able to comb thru her natural hair with no problem. What's making life so difficult for her right now is the relaxed ends. The coil/curl pattern is similiar to my own. She has used a TON of heat during her transition so I'm unsure if this is her real texture or if her growth is heat damaged (she's been pressing it). I am concerned bc she wants 'curls' and she said that if her hair doesn't 'curl' then she's going back to the relaxer. My mom is 51 years old. I wanted to ask her but didnt get the opportunity: Why are you doing this? I'm not sure what her motives are but it currently doesnt sound like one of them is to embrace her texture. Bc she doesnt seem willing to do that. What I hope is that after the relaxed ends are gone and her hair is easier to manage, she will grow to accept whatever grows out of her scalp.
I hope to be an example of that. Whatever I'm left with after I CHOP, I'm gonna embrace.
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